I can go two ways… I’m either all in or all out. I never seem to be able to find the middle ground on anything. You know… balanced. The thing I am not, although I would like to find it!
I flipped the calendar over and lo and behold we are already into May. My days run together right now since I have nowhere to go and no one to see. What better time to start practicing some new tools.
Here’s a little self-disclosure… I have fallen into a bit of a funk lately. I was recently laid off due to the pandemic so I have found myself with a lot of time to be in my head. If you know me, you realize that’s not always the safest neighborhood to be in! To top it off, I decided to isolate in my dark room and do an indefinite Netflix marathon. I would come out long enough for the occasional Starbucks or Wal Mart run. Depression set in.
Here we are… time for a change, but with a twist! And what better time than right around Cinco de Mayo. So I set daily goals. I started out with things like drinking at least 80 oz of water per day, then added daily walks, then added my nightly check in, and today I made a to-do list….
You may be wondering where the Cinco de Try-O comes in… well, being the OCD person that I am, I have a tendency to set myself up for failure. I will set high goals and if I don’t succeed then I quit because I hate to lose. (Silly logic, but quitting isn’t losing, it’s just quitting!)
Today as I was out for my walk I realized that I am going to TRY my best… I had 13 items on my “to do” list just for today (and this was not one of them). Some of them were quite simple, like “tacos for dinner” and “drink 5 bottles of water”. What I realized is that I don’t have to kill myself to get them all done. I can go to bed with the one item not completed, and put it on tomorrow’s list… and I didn’t fail.
To some that be a no brainer, but to me that’s a big step forward. Instead of moving it to tomorrow’s list I would typically throw the list away and never complete my goals. I am learning grace and acceptance and allowing myself to be human. Balance.
P.S. the other hidden gem (although I really hate to admit this) is that since I have been walking my depression has been lifting. It’s that dirty little secret that you have to listen really close for. Even my dog is happier.
So if you want to uncover some joy go out and get some fresh air. Write a to do list and give yourself some grace when you leave things undone. Tomorrow is another day!